What a weekend.

First off, I don't think I could sensibly explain in a way where people would understand what seeing The National on Friday meant to me. It was fucking mindblowing. Phenomenal. Favorite show, best show, I've ever been to. And although I haven't been to many, it was the kind of show where you can just flat out be certain of, it was so great. I got Aaron's pick at the end of their set before their encore, which was wonderful. They played my favorite song, All The Wine. And although Shannon didn't want to wait around to meet them (oh agony!!!) and I didn't have the money to get a shirt (three bucks too short!!!!) I left with this incredible sense of "Wow, that didn't just happen, now did it?"
So now I'm ripping Mp3s off of Youtube from the show, and I'm still in awe.
All the trouble I went through to get to this show, you have no idea.
And then it all happened and it was so worth it and how I want to relive it, you have no understanding.
*sigh*

Last night I fell in love without you.
I waved goodbye to that heart of mine
Beating solo on your lawn

Every aching wound will cauterize and bruise
In memory of what we used to call in love
And only time will tell if violins will swell
In memory of what we used to call in love
We used to call it love

Last night I fell in love without you
The coup-de-grace that set me off
Would've made for decent fiction

Every aching wound will cauterize and bruise
In memory of what we used to call in love
And only time will tell if violins will swell
In memory of what we used to call in love
We used to call it...

Last night I fell in love without you
The stars at night aren't as big and bright
As you make them out to be

And every aching wound will cauterize and bruise
In memory of what we used to call in love
And only time will tell if violins will swell
In memory of what we used to call in love
In memory of when we used to call it love

Update

The National is like, three days away. Plans to leave in the morning and skip school were raped in the bum so we're going to leave after third period (screw choir, I'm going to put the nix on that) and get our asses to Philly. I can't wait.

As for other news...
I'm happy. So happy. So, so, so very happy. Let's just say the most wonderful things happen at the most unexpected times.

I think that I

deleted all the pictures I had of either us or just you. Cleared out the recycle bin, too, so they're officially lost someplace in cyberspace.
Where they belong now.

ten days away? i think?

the show in philly is only ten days away or eleven days or something like that.
johno's mad at me, who knows why
i may be dragged to campage this weekend (ugh) and my ipod is dying so yeah... i wouldn't mind it so much if my ipod were in good condition but it's half non-functional.
so im starting an ipod fund. feel free to donate, guys.

im going to try getting to bed at a good hour tonight. so ima shower and then get on that.

night

don't be a nightingale

Here's where I begin to forget you.

fingers crossed!

big hopes for tomorrow night, i really really really hope it all works out!!!!
great night of cult film and maybe some mini chimis at perkins?


fingers crossed, guys :D

see yaaaa

I remember what you said.

I have wasted years of my life
Agonizing up at the fires
It started when I thought that to be strong you must be flame retardant
And now to dress the wounds cause into question
How authentic they are
There is always someone criticizing me
She just likes paying hospital
Lying in my bed
I remember what you said
There's no such thing as accidents

5:44

passed my grad project, so i officially have no big projects to think about for the rest of the year. hallelujah!


i'm gonna go find something to do now.




p.s. i still only think of you.

can't wait for

the weekend. i hope friday works out, i've got a pretty cool group of folks going to see cannibal holocaust if all goes well.
i finally put those paintings up, and i'm about to clean up my room a bit before i finish my grad project index cards (er, start them...). i shouldve brought my damn notebook home this weekend for history... but i think this test should be pretty easy... so i shan't worry too much.
today was a good day. i gardened with my mom all day for the most part, and i made her a card. i hope she had a good momma's day.
did you know that if the average momma got paid for all the work at home she does, she'd get paid 122,000 dollas a year? if only, if only. she needs some more respect, ya know?
anyhoos. i have my grad project tomorrow, and then wednesday i'm volunteering at the special olympics at school, and right after school i'm going to brere's house for a readthrough of his new screenplay, so my hopes are that this week passes by a little quicker than the past two.
my allergies are killing me!
one week closer to seeing the national.
oh my gah.
well, good night.


p.s. still thinking of you

back to square one

i hope you know that i would do anything in the world to have you back in my life.

you're funny.

you're depressed all of the fucking time, and i deal with your shit although it agitated the hell out of me half the time.
you know i have my bad days, and today is one of them. so thanks a lot for your understanding.

and i think its DISGUSTING when you burp.

A new leaf?

Thanks to my mother and her insensitive approach to honesty I'm realizing that I need to stop begging people to hang out with me because it doesn't work and doesn't get me anywhere.
I'm sick of feeling like I've got nothing to look forward to because people leave me hanging all the time.
I feel like absolute shit and I cried a lot today and I think I want to kidnap Chestuh the beagle and have him sleep in muh bed tonight. Hopefully my allergies don't explode.

I close my eyes, thought I was lost but I was stranded

I'm listening to Something Corporate, about to get my butt off of here because I have some studying to do for a biology test tomorrow I didn't review my shit for so... yes.
This week has been too long. At least tomorrow's Friday... I just want to go do something Friday night.
I took a nap earlier so its safe to say I'll be up a while longer working on science stuff. So that's a good time.
I really think District 9 looks like a really fucking cool movie.
Chester the cutieface is barking at skunks or something.
Norman the fish is hiding behind his squid.
And I'm braindead, as you can very likely tell.

Night, folks. I need to get to sleep as soon as I cram my brain with biology.
OH SHIT I FORGOT I HAVE TO TYPE UP A FREAKING OUTLINE FOR PUBLIC SPEAKING

ahhhh damnit

nighth1!!!!

Gnyuk!

I still profess, the goldfish's name is Norman and that's where it ends. Roberto, I don't care if you don't like the name, because it's the most suitable name for a goldfish that there ever was. Ever. Especially this one, who poops little sausages and makes that funny face all the time (lord knows why I find it so interesting).

So, it's Norman. El Fin.

(OH MY GOD PUN! hehehe)

Still working on coming up with a good name for the webzine, it's between like, Dirty Mangos, My Dog's Breakfast, Mickey Bliss, Geriatric Angst (I'm sorry man, but I haven't let go of that damn name)... and probably something else. I was working on a list during Bio deux so... yeah. Good times.

Night folks!

Webzine

It's this notion I have that I really want to do something with my spare time; something productive and meaningful that could very well grow to be something really damn cool. My idea was originally to start a print-zine; hard copies Xeroxed and stapled by hand and distributed by hand. This is all in the spirit of what a zine really initially was: an independently produced and distributed work. However, that isn't as cheap, easy or eco-friendly as I was really going for so now I'm settled on working on a Webzine on Blogspot; basically all the frills of a zine but more user-friendly, easier to manage, can be updated more often, is more with the times of a technology-fueled world...and of course takes a hell of a lot less paper (let's say, none) and is free to do. With a good community behind it we could get a lot of weekly or bi-weekly or read-it-as-often-or-not-as-they'd-like readers. That'd be swell, huh?
So first off, I need to come up with a name. It's got to be memorable. Short and memorable, and random. I can't get tired of it because I've got to make it into a permanent URL and everything so... as soon as the name business is out of the way I'm free to work on as many graphics as I would like for the site's aesthetics (and create the site to begin with). I've collected a lot of content folks have sent it already, but I want more, and after everything's set up I can start working on an actual "issue" so to speak. I need to talk to some chaps about possible columns or rants. It's all about content; the site could look as fancy as a purple goat and it still wouldn't mean shit if the content's complete shit.
So that's the plan:

1. come up with a name/create site
2. design design design
3. work on issue
4. let the world know!

My hopes are that this could actually go somewhere. So I'm going to go shower and then work more on step one so that I can get this shit going.

Night folks

Church on White

But all you really wanted
Was everything
Plus everything
And the truth
I only poured you
Half a line

My weekend.

Friday was okay.
Saturday was miserable.
Sunday was okay.

Mostly, I find myself asking why it's impossible to actually have fun weekends anymore.
I realize it's because that's all in the past, whatever, I've got to move on from that.
I'm going to have tons more boring weekends. I sort of can't really expect anything better than that.
I miss having really good nights with really good people. Mostly just him.
I'm missing that feeling I had more and more each day. I need to fucking move on.
But I'm not sure I entirely want to.

Whatever.

Miserable day.

Guess what I'm done
Writing your book
The ending got twisted around
But for all the hell that it took
The electrical wires
They'll hum in the walls
In the room that I rent now without you



There's an acting workshop tomorrow afternoon I kinda sorta hope I can get to.
So Idk.